You know, Bruce, I always thought it'd be great to be approached by an alien life form and be asked to take them to my leader, because my response would be: "Duude, no wonder we believed you were superintelligent beings, you came straight to me!"
It's the classic gag. "No, no, I'M the Doctor. Yeees, it's all those other people that are crazy..."

For the last couple of months, I wasn't so sure about that anymore.

Thanks, Bruce, I need the encouragement, maa'n. All my shit is not in it's togetherness, and way past due. It's an interesting, difficult, and quick journey. (that will hopefully make a great book! whoo!)

btb: if an alien asked you to take them to your leader who would you go to?
ask your kids how E.T. felt about meeting the president

Unfinished serial Juice – Bar scene segment

Guido man: Just shut up you stupid bitch!

Hooker: I’m stupid!? The fact that I haven’t left is only case you got. And besides, it’s better to be a bitch than someone else’s…you’ll have to just take my word for it, sweetcheeks.

Guido man: Let’s stick to the ones you gettin’ paid for ‘uh?

Hooker: I’m just saying if you want to make it look less conspicuous that you had to pay a chick to put up with you - and that was actually here on their own free will – maybe…to suck the gold chains off your neck or something … you’d get a little more respect, if you gave any…

Guido man: (grabs her wrist) I said shut the FUCK up or you’ll be promptly reminded this temporary employment doesn’t cover what happens when you out why Bruno carries a fork. (Bruno brandishes a fork, guido man tightens grip) Got it, bitch?

Hooker: (very scared) Got it. Please. I was only saying that… (Bruno brandishes fork again)

Guido man: Damn, bitch, when I stick my dick in you mouth later, is your pussy gonna start talkin’?


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In tribute to a work in progress, I call this piece:

LINDSEY LOHAN SPEAKS OUT!